I love You, but despise when you are boiled down to simple equations.
As if, Lord,
As if, it’s as easy as 1-2-3, or even
As if prayer is: I ask + I have faith = I get.
Lord, I get so fed up with this mentality.
never has been,
never will be,
was never intended to be:
merely for me, predominantly concerning me, etc.
Prayer has been and always will be bigger than me. And thank you, Lord, for that. I know this because, it was before me and will be after me. It stands outside me, which means that I am not its focus.
But you are!
You, the true "I Am", you are its focus! Your wants and your desires are what prayer is about. And so, Lord, my prayer life has become more pure as I’ve started to focus less on constantly using words like: “I,” “Me,” and “Myself." Instead, I shall ask about you, your wants and desires, your will. And I shall ask for your presence to be around me and in me, Lord.
I feel privileged to know this, O God, Indeed, I feel privileged to no longer cling to a theology of prayer that torments my soul because I'm at the center, a theology of prayer that leaves you standing in the corner, sometimes like a coward refusing to answer me. No! You are a God with a mighty presence, and I know that the more I'm removed from the equation, the more you become mightier in my life. And that sort of math, well, that’s the sort of math I want to be good at! Spirit, may you add yourself to me in such a way that you may increase and I decrease!