“For it is not an enemy who reproaches me . . . but my equal, my companion, and my acquaintance.” -Psalm 55:12-13
Lord Yahweh, my desire is anger, to hold someone in the space of my heart where I can give them a ranting lecture of two, four, and twenty-four. But they have gone, slipped their moorings, left without a word while ignored messages are left floating in their wake. What may be worse is hating the feeling of hate for one I cared so deeply for. I can not hold on to this. I want justice, and can not have it, for only You can offer justice through perfect love and mercy. Even if that love is an all consuming fire, let it burn them - but Lord, also let it burn me, for I have not loved nor cared perfectly, and while I deserved far better from them, they also deserve better from me. Amen.