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I Wonder: A Reflective Prayer

God, in your presence, I wonder again today.

I wonder how I made it to where I am?

Statistically speaking, things just don't line up. I've read of friends heading off to prison, mistreating their children, mistreating the children of others, abusing their spouses, I see newsflashes of them robbing banks, and leading police on high-speed chases, and having drug labs found in their homes. And I think back to grade school, to the times when we played kickball together, to the times when we stood in the lunch line together, and my heart sinks. And...

I wonder how I made it to where I am?

And why that's not me too? I don't accept the easy answers that some give, answers like predestination. I don't believe that! But I can't help but think that you can be found in the mix somewhere. There is a reason. Is it because I chased you while they chased other things? Is it because I set my sights on something different than they did? Lord, today, with a heavy heart, I wonder. Why not me? This, I may always wonder.

I wonder how I made it to where I am?

The only answer I have: You and your grace.

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