I’ve put you through a lot. I’ve wrestled with you. I’ve stressed you out. I’ve hurt you. Others have hurt you. I’ve led you through the gauntlet of emotions. I’ve put you through the wringer. For more than four decades I’ve not nurtured you the way I should have.
I’ve fed you with ill-conceived plans. I’ve given birth to sinful desires in you. I’ve toyed with you. At times, I’ve ignored you. At times, I’ve relied too much on you. I’ve asked you to bear more than I should’ve.
I wish I had given you more attention. I wish I would’ve cultivated better practices to care for you. I wish I would’ve been a better steward of you.
For too long, I’ve claimed you as my own. Two decades ago, I thought I made the best decision ever when I gave you to Jesus. But two decades later, I realize that such an act was only the beginning. It’s taken years to realize that I’ve only given you to Jesus piecemeal. It’s taken years to realize that each day that’s what I’m supposed to be doing.
So, I’m sorry for when I haven’t.
Dear Heart, I’m sorry for when I’ve held you back from Jesus, when I’ve kept you to myself. Today, I try again: I want to give you to Jesus. And I’m wise enough now, years later, that tomorrow my prayer-letter to you, dear Heart, will be the same.
Dear Heart, meet Jesus again. Jesus, meet dear Heart. And, Jesus, have your way.